Going Crazy!

Have you ever wondered if you really could be going crazy. The last two weeks of my life have been such a roller coaster that I honestly think if it doesn't stop soon that I just might go crazy. It has been nothing but up and downs physically, emotionally, and spiritually.

For example yesterday my 3rd graders performed for the school. The behavior of all he kids was so bad that I went back to my room and cried and seriously pondered what other kind of job I could find, cause apparently I wasn't cut out for teaching. But then today all of my classes were great, I actually was able to teach instead of babysit and it was wonderful. Then this afternoon I went to the park to enjoy such a beautiful day, I sat and read and wrote in my journal and even commented on how content I was feeling and that even though my life is not what I expected it to be at 27 that I wouldn't have chosen any different, and I turn around not 5 hours later upset with the fact that I am sitting at home alone on a Friday night, terrified that I am going to turn into some crazy cat lady because I will be alone forever.

I don't get it! I don't understand how I flip flop like I do. I don't like it but I don't know how to stop it either. I have decided that living alone is not good for me, I have way too much time to spend with myself which only seems to cause me grief. Some people are good at being on their own but I am not one of them. Yet, at 27 I hardly know any single people let alone single women who wouldn't mind having a roommate.

I am really having a hard time right now, so if you think of me will you please say a little prayer that this loneliness won't completely eat me alive.