Torn

Here lately I have been torn as to where to go to church. I have been a member of Grace for 6 years now and there are so many things that I love about Grace. Our pastor is an excellent teacher, we have an amazing desire for missions and seeing God's glory spread through the entire earth and we are active in pursuing it. We are really focusing on training our leaders in the church though bible classes, mentorship, and other things. We are actively involved in the community as well and support many local outreaches with our finances and volunteers. I think these things are all very important to the life of a church. These are things I want to be involved in and really want my the church I attend to be passionate about.

The torn part comes in worship and prayer. Yes, we sing on Sunday and on occasion we have prayer time during service but there rarely passion. I am a worshiper at heart, singing is how I connect with God, that is when I feel my spirit and His Spirit are connected. I have such a desire to be with others who are passionate lovers of Christ and are not afraid to be honest and passionate in worship. That if I decided to sing what was on my heart or dance before God no one complains that they are distracted by my worshiping. I also want to be in a place that prays and prays passionately all of the time. Not just a pastoral prayer before the sermon but serious time taken out to pray for one another. We do that on occasion but I don't think that is nearly enough. Prayer is our life line, it is so powerful and yet so overlooked most of the time.

So really I am torn. Should I continue to be involved at Grace for discipleship reasons and go elsewhere for worship and prayer? Which is what I am doing now. Should I look for another church where all of these things are incorporated? Does such a place even exist? I don't know. I love Grace and have become attached to the people there yet at times when I walk in the door I feel like a complete stranger. AHHHHH!!! I just don't know. I am praying but still haven't gotten an answer.